Here’s a piece of work we all need to do:  determine when life is and is not worth living, including determining when artificially maintained “life” is not really life. Then we need to determine who is our most trustworthy friend or family member to speak for us when we can’t speak for ourselves.

Here’s a resource to help you start your own conversation.  Come, add your voice.

Many blessings to you, Pat Sullivan

copyright 2012 by Pat McHenry Sullivan

Without vision, we perish, or at least we get stuck with plans and agreements that impact everyone but serve no one.

Prime example:  the whole US Congress and our often spineless president, who have managed to lock us into a totally non-visionary plan aimed at avoiding default that in truth seems to make no-one but cable news pundits happy.  And for these pundits the only happiness lies in the fodder it gives them for more ongoing commentary.

Now I know the Congress isn’t totally to blame for this mess.  We’re all part of the culture that demands quick fixes and is addicted to fear, unfounded reporting, and blame.  We’re all at least partially the creators of an economy that puts our undiscerning trust into things like forever increasing housing prices and the big gambling casino masquerading as the stock market instead of finding a better way to discern what’s truly valuable.

Pride, Self-will and Fear Prevent Us From Having a Great Government

And we’re all part of an electorate who are anything but the visionaries we were born to be when it comes to electing our officials.  Instead of carefully assessing who gets our vote, we tend to make unstudied decisions based on our biases and a whole lot of emotional/spiritual distortions caused by pride, self-will and fear.

According to the Pathwork™ almost all human failings come from the innumerable manifestations of these three faults.  Each is a distortion of something wonderful about being human.  Each can readily be seen in politics, though it’s usually easier to see it in the “other side” than in our own.

Pride distorts our true self-esteem and self-respect into idealized self-images or beliefs “that we are better than others so we have a right to our self-importance and specialness.  … The antidotes to pride are honest self-confrontation and humble self-acceptance out of which real self-esteem comes.”

“Self-will says we must get what we want when we want it, thereby justifying our egotism: ‘I want what I want when I want it’. Self-will is distinct from free will, which is simply the capacity of the entity to choose, to direct, to activate. Self-will occurs when free will is used in the service of the little self, the limited ego consciousness, in an attempt to control others and life.”

Fear distorts the brilliant instincts and information systems that warn us of potential danger.  Fear instead comes from attitudes that say, “‘I will not trust’, and often also ‘if I am not special, or do not get my way, then something terrible will happen’. Fear both supports and results from the attitudes of pride and self-will. Fear keeps us restricted within the narrow boundaries of the little ego-self. The attitude of fear often makes us justify negative thoughts and acts which we never face directly because we are lost in the disorientation caused by fear.”

(The preceding quotes were taken from notes from the Pathwork™ in Texas on “Facing the Lower Self,” Chapter 6 of The Undefended Self by Susan Thesenga

Yes, I know it’s fun to assess all the fear, pride and self-will in various “them” categories.  A more productive path is to look at our own stuff, so we can see how it’s blocking our clear sight of what is, our tremendous possibilities to imagine something better, and our ability to discern the difference between truth and illusion.  The better we do this, the easier it is to work with others who also get stuck in their own pride, self-will and fear.

Without Vision, The US Wouldn’t Even Be Here

So much US history is truly visionary.  The dreams of freedom from a motley crew of scattered ordinary people led first to the vision of freedom from colonialism, then the creation of a constitution and bill of rights that can still work today.  Over the decades, various individuals and groups have faced down various manifestations of pride, self-will and fear — like racism, a hurting environment or massive impoverishment — and created visionary approaches to big problems by bringing out the best that is in us.

We very much need such visionary leadership now. Especially now, in the wake of the debt agreement that sets us up for so much ongoing disagreement.  Especially now, when we are so divided, so overwhelmed by information and so starved for due diligence or the quiet time we need to discern either what we truly need as a country or how to get it.

I know it’s not easy to create a vision, but we can do it.   The first step I’d like all Congresspeople to take is to kneel by the Washington National Cathedral’s statuette of Abraham Lincoln kneeling in prayer.  Like all of you, he needed guidance to deal with a country at odds with itself.  And like I know many of you have found, as Lincoln did, “I have often been driven to my knees by the knowledge that I had no place else to go.”’’  You can see the photo of Lincoln kneeling here.

In fact the sculptor of this statuette, Herbert S. Houck, was the grandson of a man who saw Lincoln kneeling in the woods just before delivering the Gettysburg Address. Notice how this only 38” high statuette manages to portray strength, courage and a lot of humility.  We need that from our leaders.

Please, dear Congress, President and other leaders, go past your own belief systems, to what Meister Eckhart calls “the god beyond God,” to the truth that is bigger than any pride, self-will or fear, so we imperfect people can work better together.

Please, help us break free of the crippling idealized self images like America First of “Greatest Country in the World, Always!.” Help us see our true gifts so that we can not jus deal with the challenges of economy, but find our rightful, humble, truly self-respecting country among other great countries.

Please.  Please be the best self we elected you to be so you can help call out the best in us.

And thank you for being willing to be out there in the public eye, daring to take on the challenges.  Let us know how we can help you.

Comments are welcome.  Many blessings as always, Pat McHenry Sullivan

copyright 2011 by Pat McHenry Sullivan

That statement from a post on Visionary Times almost a year ago is even truer today.  Because it impacts your spirit, work and money, check out the full post here:   http://www.visionary-resources.com/2011/06/18/without-vision-we-perish/

Look no further than the legal field.  Case in point:  Scott Rogers, creator of The Mindful Lawyer,” and his delightful “The Mindfulness Memo: the Motion for an Extension of Thyme.”  Here’s just one tidbit that is useful for any job:

Thoughts like “I don’t have enough time,” or “I’ll never get this done in time” have both a factual quality and a “fear-based” quality.  While it can sometimes be the case that poor planning or circumstances result in a genuine rush, more often than not, the perception of “not enough time” is a conditioned thought that arises and, when believed, creates a “false” sense of crises that undermines performance.”

Rogers’ solution: mindfulness or meditation practices that can “help provide greater clarity of mind, focus, and ease in dealing with procrastination and time deadlines.” For tips you can use right now to turn your day from harried to happy, click here:

For More Peace and Productivity At Work, Imitate Some Lawyers

“The Motion for an Extension of Thyme” is just one of 500 pages of tips and resources in J. Kim Wright’s Lawyers as Peacemakers, which has been a best-seller since it was published by the American Bar Association last spring.  It’s chock full of information on how to bring more creativity, problem-solving effectiveness  and spirit to any job, legal or not. There’s even a reprint of an article I wrote on how to create a sanctuary at work!

At least a dozen mainstream law schools like Harvard and Yale offer courses in meditation as part of a mindful lawyering practice.  For information on meditation, contemplative practices and how you can bring a variety of contemplative practices to your work, see also the Center for Contemplative Mind in Society,  Cutting Edge Law, and Idealawg.

What Can You Learn From a Lawyer to Improve Your Work and Life?

What kind of hope and inspiration can you take from lawyers who meditate?

How can you bridge the need to be focused, clear and absolutely practical with your own drive for meaning, purpose and joy?

How can you create more productive time and pleasure in your life and work by being more conscious?

As always, comments are welcome!

Best wishes, Pat McHenry Sullivan
Appreciator of Lawyers

copyright 2010 by Pat McHenry Sullivan

Mother Theresa: The Seller Who Changed the World

by Carol Costello in The Soul of Selling (Benbella Books, page 183)

My personal inspiration for selling is Mother Theresa.  She had a vision based on authentic personal values, and overcame everything in the way of realizing that vision.  She discovered how to energize her resources and speak effectively to people about giving her money to help the poor.  She saw everyone she contacted as the Christ, and she kept going until she got the result.  That is compassion, combined with clarity and commitment, in service to others.  That is spiritual practice.

What if Mother Teresa had just sympathized with the poor of Calcutta?  What if she had felt very sad about them and talked about them with her friends over lattes, but rejected any real action because the scope of the problem was so large?  Or because going around asking people for money wasn’t “spiritual”?  Or because she didn’t want to rock the boat and question the system?  Or because she might be uncomfortable, embarrassed, or rejected?

Instead, Mother Teresa became a force of nature.  She sold her vision, raised a great deal of money, and made the world a better place because she was in it.  You can do those things, on as large a scale as you please.

How Are You Called To Sell What Matters To You?

This is Pat Sullivan again, the usual author of this blog. Even if we don’t have to sell a product or service in order to make a living, we’re always selling.  At the least, we have to sell ourselves on saying yes to exercise, no to un-nurturing food; yes to patience and thoughtfulness, no to the latest fear-mongering “news” or excess consumerism; yes to real pleasures that enrich our lives, no to cruelty or titillation that hurt others and take us away from who we really are.

There’s so much in Carol’s quote to ponder.  What could you envision to benefit yourself and others if you anchored into your most authentic self and listened to what your heart and soul are saying right now?  What courage would you find to move from just feeling sorry for the pain in the world to action that enriches you as well as others?

If selling is part of your paid work, what can you learn here about selling from your heart and soul?  Will it require you to say no to selling what is not true and moving on, even if it costs you a well-paying job now?  Will it require you to have more courage, if you are selling products of services with true value, so you can connect compassionately and respectfully with those who need just what you have to offer?

I’m very grateful to Carol for introducing me to the concept of selling as a spiritual practice. To me that means I can only sell that which I know to be anchored in integrity, serving a useful purpose, and offering joy or at least the alleviation of suffering.  And it means I can only sell in a way that is anchored in integrity, authentic, and purposeful.

What does it mean to you?  What tips do you have for people like me who are just learning to do this, and who want to sell with more integrity, purpose and the capacity for joy?

As always, many blessings to you, and your comments are most welcome.

Pat McHenry Sullivan

copyright 2010 by Pat McHenry Sullivan

Yes, almost everyone needs to stop worrying about work, but it’s a bad idea to think that to relax, you need to stop thinking about work while you’re on vacation.  Here’s a better idea:  allow your best vacation mind to transform your workdays so they are all more fun, more relaxed, more satisfying.  Consider:

1.    When you’re relaxed, it’s easier to see new options, discover new allies or resources.
2.    When you’re away from home, trying new things, meeting new people, your perspective broadens.

3.    When you’re away from irritating people at work, it’s easier to have compassion for them.  Nothing facilitates creativity and wisdom about how to deal with irritating people better than compassion.

4.    Vacation offers time to try new spiritual practices and turn them into new habits.

5.    As stress melts on vacation, it’s easier to see more clearly what matters to you and what doesn’t.  This sets the stage for visions and plans that support your values.

6.    Vacations can help you see more clearly the wonder and beauty of the universe.

7.    Vacations help you remember how essential laughter and play are to your entire body, mind and spirit.

Vacations Can Be a Great Catalyst for New Work Visions

It’s as if, while on vacation, you turn off your inner radio station that won’t shut up with the negative self-talk. Instead, you’re more receptive to the quieter, more profound messages from your heart and soul.

While walking up Ben Lomond in Scotland many years ago, I thought of my plans to apply for graduate school in urban planning when I returned.  Halfway up the hill, a quiet, inner voice said, “you know you’d rather study bioenergetics and other human potential disciplines.”  Immediately, I felt the truth of that thought throughout my body — though I had never consciously considered this path. Thankfully, it has led to my true life’s work, which now focuses on the full integration of spirit, body, and mind in life and in work and business.

Vacation Rituals and Prayers Can Have a Long-term Effect

Many people have told me that they do simple rituals like this one:  carry or pick up two stones or shells as you wander into the woods or on a beach.  Into one stone imagine putting all your frustrations about work.  When you feel empty and free enough to enjoy your vacation, leave the stone in the woods, or toss it into the sea with a prayer that you can always stay free of tension or worry, or whatever else you wish to release.

Into the other stone, imagine putting the essence of all the goodness you find on vacation … the joy of just lying in the grass perhaps, and watching the clouds shift, new perspectives and ideas, or the fun of trying something new.

I love to meditate on vacation with the question:  “what wisdom and insights can I bring from vacation to my everyday life?”

I particularly love this simple affirmative prayer:  Here in this relaxed setting, I easily see how my work and life can be more relaxed.  I gratefully welcome new ideas and visions for my work and life.

How can vacation mind help transform your workday reality?

As always, feel free to comment below.

Many blessings, Pat McHenry Sullivan

copyright 2010 by Pat McHenry Sullivan

Just what is the work of our lives?

As babies our basic work includes learning to live in this world.  To crawl and eventually to toddle, then finally to walk and run.  To learn to communicate with others and to express ourselves.

Each year, the work of our lives grows bigger: to discover who we are and what matters most to us.  To find our way in this amazing universe.  To become self-responsible.  To balance conflicting needs and desires within ourselves (wanting to feel and be healthy vs. cravings for French fries and malted milkshakes) and with others (the need for self-expression versus the rights of others for privacy).  To learn how to live with gusto even when life is hard; eventually, how to die with grace, dignity, and as much consciousness as we can muster.

When life works, we bring the work of our life into our paid work, thus bringing the best of ourselves into every aspect of work, and vice versa.  Thus, as we learn to deal with issues around a boss, for instance, we learn to deal with similar issues in our lives.  As we discover more about who we are in a marriage or friendship, we are better able to have meaningful and effective workplace relationships.

Whoever we are, wherever we are, we always have the work of learning, growing, serving, and stretching.  Whether you’re being paid as a teacher of mathematics or patiently helping a grandchild learn how to drive safely, you’re engaged in the wondrous act of not only helping to pass on skills, but more importantly to help your student develop as a caring, competent person in all of life.

LifeworkStories

In this blog, I have featured stories of many people who bring the best of their spirit and everyday life to work.  I’ll continue to do so.  If you have a story to submit, send it to pat at visionary-resources dot com and put “Worklife Stories” in  the subject line.  (E-mails without this subject line or “no subject” may not be opened.)  As always, your comments are welcome.  Just click on the comments link below.

Very best wishes,

Pat McHenry Sullivan

Copyright 2010 by Pat McHenry Sullivan

I am sure my son’s generation will do just fine (as long as their mothers follow them all through life picking up after them). It’s just how we go about getting there that’s a lot different. I was taught to plan, prepare and perform (in other words – Git-er done!) My son thinks it should be done either by mom, dad someone else, or later on after his buddies go home.

Then, There’s My Father’s Generation.

My Father passed away several years ago, but I could never keep up with him. He worked 8 to 10 hours a day after he retired (and he didn’t need to work) but the simple truth is Dad enjoyed working.

Work to my Dad was his spiritual tonic. He was more in touch with Life when he was building or repairing something. He also enjoyed helping a neighbor, friend or even a stranger who wasn’t as skilled as him. Dad never, ever bragged about his accomplishments.  He simply was a “doer” and not a talker. If something needed done he did it.

When we went on vacation and stayed in the same an old apartment year after year Dad would go around and repair whatever needed fixing … yep, no kidding.  Mrs. McCool, the owner, used to chuckle and say, “Thanks Les. Where were you 40 years ago when I was looking for a good husband?”

I guess dad measured his worth by his daily work output. Dad’s generation was raised by Great Depression parents and everyone had to work and earn as much as possible just to survive.

That’s why I believe it is healthy to have the senior citizen generation available to the younger generation.

There’s a lot of valuable information and inspiration to be shared between the two of them.  I talk to seniors in assisted living facilities and nursing homes who would love an opportunity to share their stories. I hope more sons and grandsons, daughters and granddaughters take their children to visit an elder relative stuck at home or in a senior care center so they too can develop a relationship and share each other’s precious moments.

Tom Ratcliff

Tom Ratcliff is the co-founder of the National Senior Living Providers Network www.NSLPN.com, an online community for senior care professionals. Tom’s favorite pastime is reading or writing about the personal side of Senior Living. “I have fond memories of my father and grandfather. I always admired their sense of humility and their commitment to providing a helping hand to neighbors, friends and strangers as well.”

copyright 2010 by Tom Ratcliff

Fortunately, you can learn much of what you need to know about purpose-finding and marketing strategy from a 99 cent box of Trader Joe’s tissue.

Every Aspect of the Trader Joe’s Tissue Box is a Purpose and Marketing Role Model

If you don’t have a box of Trader Joe’s Tissues in front of you, click here for pictures of everything but the bottom panel.

Notice the quirky, fun design. Notice how you feel as you read each side panel message. “I’m here for you when you need to pick up icky things … you’re sick, …you’re sad … run out of toilet paper,” followed by Tissue’s signature, like “you’re welcome, Tissue.”

Notice the friendly reminder at the top of the box (like something Mama would have said when you still listened) not to leave Tissue in your pocket when you do the laundry.

Purposeful Marketing (Not Advertising) Makes Trader Joe’s a “Firm of Endearment”

“You know me better than most of my relatives do.  You care about what matters to me and the world we live in.”  That’s how I feel every time I walk into Trader Joe’s.  So many others concur and love spreading the word about how cool it is to shop there.

You can’t buy authentic endorsements like that.  But you can develop happy customers who are happy to spread your good word, according to the book Firms of Endearment, you start by caring not just about stockholder returns and CEO pay but also about all stakeholders.  Or as Firms of Endearment authors David B. Wolfe, Jagdish N. Sheth, Rajendra S. Sisodia call it , SPICE:  Society (including the earth), Partners, Investors, Customers, and Employees.

As a Firm of Endearment, you’ll undoubtedly pay your CEO’s and upper managers way less than the norm while paying employees and lower managers way more. You’ll spend little on advertising, lots on community and customer service. Not surprisingly, you’ll have astounding employee and vendor loyalty, so they’ll stick with you in hard times and help create much more profit than the norm.

Trader Joe Tissues Tips for Becoming a Firm (or Nonprofit Agency) of Endearment

Here are some tips my business planning clients and I have created:

1.    Enlist customers, donors, employees, future employees, and others to help you brainstorm all the ways you can truly say, “We’re here for you when…”

2.    Be authentic. My husband, who provides personal services for busy people, is there for you when you when you want to free up time for more important things … you want to be better organized … you want your animals cared for when you are away.

John’s also there for you when you want something translated into and out of Latin.  He doesn’t get many Latin gigs, but this service tells others that he’s intelligent, he’s willing to study things well, and he’s got a sense of humor.

3.    Be specific and focused. If we’re not careful, we overload a message with “this is how I do it” statements” or “this is the story of how I discovered this” or just too many sentences, all loaded with clause after clause after clause.  Boring!

4.     Know What Matters Most to People You Want to Serve. In business, it’s called marketing research.  Miss Manners might call it getting to know someone.  So, meet with current or potential clients.  Discover what matters to them, how they express what matters, where they hang out, and so on.  Listen at least 6 times as much as you speak.  Then listen some more.

5.      Walk your Values Talk; Talk the Values You Walk Without Proselytizing. On the bottom of the Trader Joe’s box (not pictured on the link above) an 1890′s woman tells her man how she can make him feel better by accepting her offer of a Trader Joe’s tissue.  The statement that the product is 100% recycled, and no chlorine bleach was use in making the tissues simply states values that are important to the Trader Joe’s crowd.

What Can You Learn from the Trader Joe’s Tissue Box?

Over the next few weeks, discover how some friends and colleagues are being inspired to clarify their purpose and do better marketing. Now, here’s a challenge:  how much more clear could your purpose be, how much more juicy and fun could your marketing be if you let the Trader Joe’s Tissue Box inspire you?

As always, many blessings, and please add your comments below,

Pat McHenry Sullivan